This Is How It Feels

I want to love you
To grab the fraying edges of your heart
Sew what’s dangling on thin threads
And help heal what’s still bleeding
I don’t want to fix your shadows
I want to share them

I want to make you believe
In you- and me- in love
in all the world can offer
Give you a million helium balloons
So you can soar into the clouds
Touch the sky, and eclipse the sun

I want to reach for your fingers
Anytime I want, anywhere I can
And when the sun meets the horizon
I want to look you in the eyes
Smile at you and say
Good morning

I want to love you
Show you the best parts of me
Craft a home out of our intertwined limbs
Hold us up on the blades of my shoulder
Watch flowers bloom in our soiled hearts
And know that this is where I belong

         I want to love you
                                                 Then

I want to hurt you
To tear open the sutures I placed
With uncaring and ungloved hands
Watch them unravel, bleed through your ribs
Staining the same skin my lips touched,
Forget the wounds and walk away

I want to make you believe
In every lie, every over rehearsed promise,
All woven by my clever tongue, tell you
That it’s your fault for trusting, believing
In every moment where you thought
We were given forever

I want to reach for your fingers,
Pry them from my own unfeeling hand,
Press down on the bruises left on your skin
And when the sky shifts from blue to black
leave you beneath the fickle stars
And tell you I was unchanged

I want to hurt you
To tangle the ready veins of the love you gave,
Tie them to your trusting limbs, glue their other ends
to tips of my fingers, a puppet to my will
Feel the power you felt when I smile and tell you
This is how it feels

6 responses to “This Is How It Feels”

  1. I cried… Absolutely LOVE this!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much, Ches! ❤

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  2. Wow! I was not expecting the switch up, it gave me chills 😂 I think the transition into it couldn’t be any better 👌🏻 It absorbs the reader and had a really good flow to it. Keep them coming ☺️

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much for the kind feedback! I really appreciate it! ☺️

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  3. Powerful poem, and I agree w/ mankev – the switchup is perfectly placed. I thought this was going to be a typical love piece but you got me good

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks, Jas! When I was writing this I worried that the shift was too abrupt but I’m glad to know you liked it!!

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